i don't know if anyone reading this has ever met any real-live-actual-vanillas, but there's a world of difference, apparently, between how their relationships are portrayed on tv or in films and the real thing.
how many times have you been exposed to a film in which a couple meet on-screen and within minutes, the clothes are off and both parties are doing that weird kissy thing where the male lies on top of the Woman...
i've studied this for a while and, in actuality, while it does happen now and again, it's exception rather than rule.
our relationships are broadly similar to that. we tend to come together, get to know each other progressively better and then intimacy *may* occur.
there are FemDom scenarios where Her eyes meets his and She's thrashing the jesus out out of the slave moments later. generally speaking, the speed of these relationships is\mostly determined by the fact their audience can - and do - fast forward through the lengthy courtship period to the hitty and hurty bits.
in real life, unfortunately, you can expect vanilla meetings before that 24/7 naked 'n' caged in perpetuity scenario that's been making your lap crowded.
going back to the vanilla analogy, outside of films and television, where a male and a Woman meet and start fucking within minutes, most juries would call it rape.
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